Made his first money in software writing a version of Pacman for the TRS-80. TRS-80! That ten quid didn’t go far though, so he gave up and let everyone else do the work for him. Kind, generous, intelligent, good-looking man. Signs the paycheques.
Centre of the operation. Banned from his local chip shop because he has to have a finger in every pie. Originally from the Isle of Man so has three legs, no tail, and hates paying tax.
When he's not on the golf course, or on a grand tour of Europe, or at a black-tie dinner, or entertaining at a major sports event, you'll find him working incredibly hard in his office. Unless he's at lunch. And except in the afternoons and all day on Friday of course, when he's playing golf. It's a tough gig, Finance Director.
Like all coders, Ben takes an hour to eat his Alphabetti Spaghetti because he has to finish all the 'A's before starting the 'B’s and so on. Tells jokes like, "There are 10 kinds of people, those who know binary and those who don’t." We once gave him Numberetti so that he could finish his lunch whilst it was still warm. Big mistake. Developers don’t like sudden changes to their routines.
Grumbles a lot. Remembers when computers had green screens and flashing cursors. Prefers computers with green screens and flashing cursors. Lips move when reading. Wrote this claptrap. Criminally underpaid.
Knows where everything is. If they’d asked Katie to find the Higgs-Boson they could have saved an awful lot of money. Talks a bit like the Queen.
Born in the 1990s, so refuses to believe that telephones used to have cords. When speaking, often stops half-way through a sentence because he's run out of characters. Will probably steal Ian’s car. Always wears a suit and tie, possibly to bed. Best dressed man in the office, which isn't saying much.
Also known as 'The Professor' (mostly because he can spell 'University' correctly), Gareth has an uncanny knack of spotting and solving potential issues before they occur. This could be because he is intelligent, diligent and hardworking - unusual in IT, but possible. However we think it's because he rides his motorbike so fast that he can move backwards and forwards in time. Is this, perhaps, why he's barred from all of the local bookies?
Tester/Support. The eternal battle of good and evil is as nothing when compared to testers v. developers. None shall pass, excepting applications which have survived the extensive automated testing routine known popularly as 'Helen's House of Pain'. In truth of course Helen is lovely - unless you're a bit casual with your code, but then that goes without saying.
Full of bonhomie and youthful enthusiasm, but it's early days yet. Crusty old coders may mock designers with their Macs, mood candles and talk of 'negative space', but if you leave UX/UI to developers your app ends up looking like this, when what you wanted was this. That's why we need Alex.
Having arrived from a storied career in local government, people often joke about Rich being a 'poacher turned gamekeeper'. However they miss the point that he is actually still a poacher who leverages his knowledge of arcane medieval weaponry in order to keep his food bills down. As Rich would say, you could spend all day netting a couple of pheasants and eat well that night, or you could use a trebuchet for ten minutes and dine on venison for a month. It's that kind of reasoning that makes him such a formidable project manager.
Elusive business guru and international man of mystery. Materialises at times of need to explain concepts like Pillars of Value, Windows of Opportunity and Limits of Adhesion, then silently disappears when no one is watching. If you turn up in the morning to find that your business paradigms have been realigned and there's a box of Cadbury's Milk Tray on your desk, then you know that Rob has paid you a visit. Cadbury's Milk Tray.